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Building Better Fathers


This website is committed to building better fathers.

This page lists videos worth watching and books worth reading.

Contributions welcome.

Life in Perspective

The Big Picture  -  Dr. Michael Heiser 


If you only ever watch one of Michael Heiser's  videos, then this one is it.  This one pulls it all together in one brief, 80 minute presentation, yes, 80 minutes (or watch the 4 x 90min lectures in Brain Food below).

The Divine Council World View 

Paul summarises it best in Ephesians 6:12 ... noting all the plurals ...

"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places."

You have been given the gift of life in the midst of a battle ground.  It's a battle for spiritual supremacy. I trust you will take your gift of life and your spiritual gifts seriously in your brief time here on earth.

The End Point  -  Dr. Michael Heiser


Michael Heiser has video commentaries on almost every book of the Bible at DrMSH.com.  His lectures in Revelation are wise and insightful.  Here are six end-times lectures (two short, four long) worth watching.  

Warning:  your sacred cows may need a bigger paddock.

Teaser:  Armageddon is not a battle fought at Mt. Meggido

We don't need a third temple for the end times.

Prophecy and Eschatology Class 1

Prophecy and Eschatology Class 2

Prophecy and Eschatology Class 3

Prophecy and Eschatology Class 4

Jesus MIGHT come back in your life time, he may not.  It's not as formulaic as modern American Evangelicals and Pentecostals would have you believe.

The question becomes - what are you going to do with your spiritual gifts during your lifetime - squander them or let the Holy Spirit empower them for His purpose?

You have one life to live and then you will face judgement .

Hebrews 9:27 reminds us ... "just as it is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment, so Christ, having been offered once to bear the sins of many, will appear a second time, not to deal with sin but to save those who are eagerly waiting for him".

You in Perspective

Your Character  -  David Brooks


David is a Christian Jew who writes a column for the New York Times, The Wall Street Journal and PBS News Hour.  His talks are funny and profound.

The Road to Depth  -  Thinking about what Character Is

The 5 Levels of Character

The Quest for Deeper Meaning

The Inverse Logic of Life

Your Communication  -  David Brooks

Your Role  -  Husband, father, leader, friend.

Your Personality  -  Myers Briggs, DISC et.al. 


There are multiple personality profiling tools that give us useful insight into how we interact with the world.  They include Myers Briggs, DISC, Enneagram, Love Languages and Risk Profiling tools amongst others.  I recommend the Myers Briggs Type Indicator as an all-of-life tool that can be used personally, with our families and our colleagues.  

It is important to note that the MBTI is exactly that, an indicator.  It is not authoritative or definitive.  It teaches us about our defaults in different situations and why our perspective is different to others.  It's worth understanding your personality type and how it differs to others so that you can communicate (and lead) more effectively. 

You can do the MBTI test at:

Truity.com

16 Personalities 

Personality Page  - a little clumsy to pay for a survey password but certainly worth reading their free portraits.

Pick one, do the test and then read up on your type.  It will help you understand you, your spouse and your children more effectively.

There are deeper layers to the MBTI ... none being pseudo-science or new-age gobbledygook ...  just daytime vs nighttime styles and seven-year cycles.  Once you get your head around your type and those of your family, then it's good to understand the deeper seven year cycles.  Perhaps Old Testament teaching on sabbaticals has merit.

Your love languages - Dr Gary Chapman

Dr Gary Chapman wrote the "Five Love Languages" in 1992.  It's first edition sold about 8,400 copies. It's subsequently become a best seller and unlocked some very real disconnects in couples.

Understanding both you your partners love language is a hug step towards better relationships.  Keep in mind you both have a giving love language and receiving love language ... essentially there are four preferences to get your head around.

The Five Love Languages has evolved in the last 30 years. 

What's your Love Language?

Closely related quizzes include ...

What's your Apology Language?

How well do handle anger?

Do you feel appreciated at work?

Be Present, Be Real

Absent Fathers


Fathers and father figures play a critical and distinct role in children’s lives and the evidence demonstrating fathers’ potential to positively influence their children’s health, social success and academic achievements is indisputable. 

Fathers directly impact the physical, mental, emotional, social, educational and behavioural development of children from about the age of two.  Their ongoing impact is greater than mothers.  The evil ones have a field day separating fathers from children through unrealistic career aspirations, work commitments, excessive mortgages, unbudgeted expenditure, unrealistic wives, separation and divorce.

Us men need to get smarter at balancing all of life's demands.

Neglecting to Invest in Men - The Fathering Project

Why Absent Fathers Harm Children and Ruin Society - YouTube

Healing the Scars of  a Fatherless Life  -  Wayne Alcorn
  -  Eternity News book review

Friendship, Food, Exercise & Longevity - Prof. Rose Anne Kenny


Life passes very quickly.  Psalm 144 and Job 7 remind us that our lives are but a breath of wind.  You don't have long to learn, grow and leave a legacy.

Rose Anne Kenny is the founding Principal Investigator of Ireland's largest adult population study on the experience of ageing in Ireland - The Irish Longitudinal Study on Ageing (TILDA), now in its 12th year of data collection.

Regius Kenny holds the Chair of Medical Gerontology at Trinity College Dublin. Previously Professor of Cardiovascular Research and Head of Geriatric Medicine at the University of Newcastle Upon Tyne, she is now director of a new state of the art clinical-research institute for ageing at St. James’s Hospital Dublin - Mercer’s Institute for Successful Ageing (MISA),

Her number one recommendation is to have good quality friendships and relationships throughout our lives. Then follow a healthy diet, get plenty of exercise and reduce stress.  

I suggest you plan ahead.  Start early.  The pay off will kick in your 60s.

The Key Factors to Stop Decline and Slow Aging After 40


Manage your thinking - Mel Robbins


Here are are some very valuable podcasts that will set you up for a long and productive life.  Learn to manage your thinking and motivation. 


Mel Robbins LLB


YouTube homepage


5 Second Rule - Intro  ***


5 Second Rule - Detail


Hack Your Brain


How to Leverage Dopamine and Overcome Excuses

There's lots of valuable information contained in these podcasts that will set you up for life.

Judgement, discernment, leadership

Healthy Body, Healthy Brain

Manage your brain chemistry - Dr Andrew Huberman


Here are some very valuable podcasts that will set you up for a long and productive life.  Learn to manage your hormones.  Learn to manage your brain chemistry.  Learn to manage your diet.


Dr Andrew Huberman - Professor of Neurobiology and Opthamology - Stanford University School of Medicine.


YouTube homepage.


Faith in God - 13 mins

Master Your Sleep & Be More Alert - 1 hour 22 mins


Build Inner Strength - 2 hours 37mins


Controlling Your Dopamine for Motivation & Satisfaction - 2 hours 16 mins


Truth About Laziness, Discipline, Exercise and Stress  -  1 hour 40 mins

How to Build Muscular Strength and Power - 10  mins

Manage your fitness, weight and mood


there's a whole page coming

Manage your testosterone levels


Your testosterone levels will start to drop off in your forties.

Stress, obesity, excess body fat, separation and divorce can all significantly impact our testosterone levels.  Symptoms range from cloudy thinking, listlessness, lack of energy through to anxiety, depression and helplessness.  It's not fun.

There's lots you can do to manage your testosterone levels and navigate the subtle changes effectively.  I'm sure you've heard them several times ... but they are worth following:

Seven ways to raise your testosterone for free.   YouTube

Eight ways to increase testosterone for free.   website

How to Use Fasting to Raise Your Testosterone - 13mins

Fasting - Dr Mindy Pelz


Here are some very valuable podcasts that will set you up for a long and productive life.  Mindy is passionate about six (yes, 6) different types of fasting.  Her logic is non-negotiable.



Dr Mindy Pelz


YouTube homepage


Intermittent Fasting


How to Use Fasting to Raise Testosterone

Fasting - Different men and women  11mins


How to lose belly fat


Remove fat from your liver

Dr Michael Mosely

Foods, super foods and dietary supplements



Double Your Energy Levels - Ari Whitten, M.S.  (ignore the advert at the end)

Sleep


We're learning more and more that good quality sleep is critical to hormonal regulation, dopamine production, anxiety, depression, weight gain, mental health, emotional regulation and sleep has a significant impact on our relationships.

The very best thing you can do for you and your family is regulate your sleep ... and that might mean planning, tag-teaming and periodic time-outs for new parents.  SINKs, DINKs and SITCOM relationships will all benefit from healthy sleep regulation.

Here's a fabulous video from Andrew Huberman, Professor of Neurobiology and Opthamology at Stanford U. on mastering sleep.

v1.0  Master Your Sleep  - Andrew Huberman

v2.0  Sleep Toolkit - Andrew Huberman

"Huberman Lab" - Andrew Huberman's YouTube Library

A Sabbatical Year?


The Sabbatical year in the Bible is every seventh year (Leviticus 25:1-13 and Exodus 23:10-11). The farmers and their land were called by God to rest that year and God promised a bumper crop the year before. Clearly, the Sabbatical year was a big step of trust in the goodness of the Lord to provide for his people.

The seventh year renewal included generosity for the needy, as the poor in the land were free to glean in the fallow ground during the Sabbatical year. People who had sold themselves into servitude were also given the blessing of a Sabbatical year; they worked for six years, but on the seventh year they were given their freedom without cost (Exodus 21:2-6). Similarly, debts were also canceled in the Sabbatical year (Deuteronomy 15:1-6).

Should we take a sabbatical rest? 

Bill Gaultiere believes Pastors should.

Dr Michael Heiser discuss Leviticus 23-25

Beating Depression


Depression is often a response to prolonged stress and anxiety.  It's described by some as slow-release anger.  We all know, deep down, something has been wrong or out of balance for a long time and our entire body and sub-conscious mind start to fight back.

Depression is quite common, quite normal and quite fixable.  The following plan will arrest the physical symptoms of depression. A strict adoption will get results sooner.  As the episodes pass, you can experiment by reintroducing some foods like coffee, red meat and sourdough bread in moderation.

I also recommend counselling, psychology or a deeply honest personal journal practice to get to the heart of the underlying conflicts in your soul.  There is something to learn and something that needs changing to get back to full physical and mental health.

Beating Depression - Printable doc - Harvey Rough

St.Johns Wort and Rhodiola Rosea are natural supplements that will help address and even mask the symptoms.  They will buy you some relief while you work on the bigger plan and the deeper causes.

Brain Food ...

Useful / latest Neuroscience


Neuroscience has come a long way in the last 30 years.  In particular our understanding of neuroplasticity - the brains ability to change and grow - has been turned on it's head.  In short, we can redevelop parts of our brains and use that flexibility brains to our advantage.

No1.  Neuroscientist - Dr Tara Swart - 120mins  
(warning, there are some eastern religious concepts in her thinking that don't belong in a Christian mindset.)

 


Premise - "This is Going to Hurt.  Everything You Know is False."

What if everything you think you know about yourself is wrong? Most people have the intuition that they have a self separate from their body and brain, and that they can control their experience with conscious will. But what if that isn’t true? Best-selling author Annaka Harris is devoted to challenging our deepest intuitions about the nature of consciousness and the self. On this episode of Impact Theory with Tom Bilyeu, she discusses experiments on the cutting edge of physics and neuroscience, and explains why those experiments matter. The result is a fascinating conversation that will leave you questioning some of your most cherished, comforting intuitions.

Interview with Annaka Harris - Tom Bilyeu - Impact Theory

The Unseen Realm  -  Dr. Michael Heiser


Dr Michael S. Heiser will profoundly re-energise your view of the Old Testament forever.  Michael is an Old Testament Hebrew Scholar and Professor in Semitic languages.  He is a gifted teacher; his unpacking of Old Testament Hebrew is profoundly simple and comprehensive.

DrMSH.com is his gateway to hundreds of podcasts, books, lectures and subject-specific websites.  His four major books  -  The Unseen Realm, Angels, Demons, Reversing Hermon - How the Book of Enoch bleeds into the New Testament  -  are worth reading.  They are linked here at The Unseen Realm.

Michael's supernatural seminars are 50-80 minutes in length and worth digesting in multiple passes.

The Supernatural Seminar - Part One

The Supernatural Seminar - Part Two

The Supernatural Seminar - Part Three

The Supernatural Seminar - Part Four


Christmas and the Feast of Saturnalia


Christmas is a precious time of family, feasts and gifts.  It's usually full of happy memories for children of all ages.  

The commercial foundations of Christmas are obviously flawed.  It's not about expensive gifts or plastic toys that will pollute landfill for generations.  It's essentially a loving God making a very clear statement to His creation that we are not in some statistical aberration alone.  He is committed to our lives here and in eternity.

The festive-feasts of Christmas often cause stress and budget overreach. We don't need to go overboard and we don't have to conform to the television imagery.  Aim for good quality food with family and friends; don't over indulge and plan for leftovers.

Spoiler alert ... Jesus wasn't really born on December 25 in the year 0.  Revelation 12 points to His birth on the September 11, 3 BC.  

The Birthday of Jesus   (12 mins)

In the early fourth century, Constantine fixed the date of Christmas as December 25.  The date corresponded with the traditional date of the winter solstice on the Roman calendar.  It is exactly nine months after Annunciation on March 25 - the date of the spring equinox.  It also happened to be the date that pagans celebrated the death of the old year and the birth of new in the northern hemisphere.

Traditionally, the Romans celebrated the Feast of Saturnalia for a week starting on the 17th of December. Saturn was the God of Agriculture and sacrifices were made to invite Saturn's blessing for the new agricultural year ahead.

December 25 is symbolic only.  John speaks of Jesus birth in Revelation 12:1-5.

Revelation 12 - What Day Was Jesus Born?   (90 mins)

What do the Magi and the Dead Sea Scrolls have in common?   (10 mins)

There's no numerological messaging in 9/11, 3 BC ... but it is easy to remember.


N.B.  Hebrew astrologers did not associate the position of the planets with personality attributes or fate.  That's heresy.  Genesis 1:14 states  "Let there be lights in the expanse of the sky to separate the day from the night. They will serve as signs for seasons and for days and years."  The lights are measures, not masters.

Valuable Books to Enrich Your Life


I love reading a book a week.  The following books are the bare minimum read ... the essentials ... the non-negotiables ... to get a better perspective on life.

Loving God - Charles Colson  (yes, one of Nixon's Watergate staffers)

Boundaries - Cloud & Townsend

The Unseen Realm - Dr Michael Heiser

The Road Less Travelled - M. Scott Peck

The Five Love Languages - Dr Gary Chapman 

You are most welcome to suggest more.

Useful planners

 Make a copy and start to think ...

Annual Personal Planner

Annual Family Planner 

Family Budget

Individual Budget

Student budget

courtesy of www.PragmaticPlanners.com